Chicken Soup and ANWR Drilling for the Soul

So apparently John McCain’s energy policy is now based around the “pyschological impact” of those studies instead of, you know, tangible results. Which I guess explains his support of the gas tax holiday.

Here are a few other planks in his energy strategy:

-Free Prozac for everyone.
-Once a week, he will give a special address to the nation in which he will remind us how very important and special we are.
-Federal law mandating that all small businesses provide stress balls for their employees.
-Secretary of Energy: Tony Robbins
-Widespread distribution of boogie boards to increase the fun and reduce the negative psychological impact of all the polar icecaps melting.
-Will promise to practice fake smile more, plans to have it upgraded from “horrifying ghoul-thing” to “electrocution victim” by 2012.

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